May 7, 2007

unexpected words

over the weekend, i got to spend some time with my 9-month old nephew. he's super cute & really funny! being the only baby in our family, he doesn't lack attention (at all!). of course, from time-to-time the topic of another baby comes up in our family's conversations. and, i just look at my sister (jen) and brother-in-law (ryan) with raised eyebrows (being that neither my brother (Matt) nor I are dating anyone). my sister laughs & asks my nephew if he wants a brother or sister...and my nephew shakes his head NO (of course, he doesn't really know what he's doing, he just like the laughter he gets from all of us). whether my sister and brother-in-law are planning on having more children, I cannot say. but events like this bring two stories to mind...

the first story, happened several years ago - it was the summer before jen's senior year of high school (i would have been entering the 6th grade). jen's best friend was pregnant. as we sat eating dinner one night up at the cabin, my dad nervously approached the subject of pre-marital sex (mind you, I was 10). As I remember it, the conversation went something like this..."As you guys know, Jen's friend is pregnant and only a senior in high school. (I did not know that information & while processing i may have missed part of the conversation immediately following the news....but I do recall my dad continuing...) If any of you get pregnant or (looking at Matt) get anyone else pregnant, you will be disowned from the family." end of conversation. imagine my shock and awe at the 60 second conversation that just unfolded before my 10-year-old eyes and ears. sex was about the furthest thing from my mind (right next to drugs and killing people), but the conversation had its desired effect - I wasn't having sex with anyone...perhaps EVER!

fast forward about 14 years... same family sitting at the dinner table. normal conversation somehow turns to babies and grandchildren. oh, how drastically my dad has changed his tune. this time the conversation unfolds something like this: talk about babies, talk about my parents wanting to be grandparents, talk about my sister being the only one married. then my dad says "ya know, you don't have to be married to have a baby." he said it so matter-of-factly, like he was telling me it was 85 and sunny out or that he shot a 70 on the golf course that day. again, i was in shock and awe! did my protective (don't touch my little girl), and Catholic I might add, father just give me the approval to have a baby out of wed lock??? no one in the family was quite sure how to respond to this statement. we gave a collective "really?" and laughed a bit...ok then, thanks dad.

just goes to show you that sometimes people change their minds, given the context of life. and sometimes, ya just have NO IDEA what might come out of someone's mouth. The threat of the first conversation eventually wore off on me, and I have yet to buy into the second conversation...but who knows what conversations we have to look forward to.

1 comment:

Tim said...

Wow, that is quite a change but I imagine all dads have a similar "don't touch my little girl" approach. Your dad must be ahead of the curve though - I didn't think that would wear off until you were about 40. :)