June 5, 2008

confucius says...jokes

Work had been very busy & I needed a laugh...so I thought I would share some funny with my readers...

Man who run in front of car get tired.
Man who eat many prunes get good run for money.
War doesn't determine who is right, war determines who is left.
Man who drive like hell bound to get there.
Man who lives in glass house should change clothes in basement.
Man who run behind car get exhausted.
Man who walk through airport turnstile sideways going to Bangkok.
He who thinks only of number one must remember this number is next to nothing
Man who farts in church sits in his own pew!
Wash your face in the morning, neck at night.
Man who put head on Railroad track to listen for train likely to end up with splitting headache.
Man who tell one too many light bulb jokes will soon burn out!
Man who sneezes without tissue takes matters in his own hands.
Wise man never play leapfrog with unicorn.
Man who drop watch in toilet, bound to have shitty time.
Passionate kiss like spider's web ... soon lead to undoing of fly.
Wife who put husband in dog house soon find him in cat house.
Man who fight with wife all day, get no piece at night.
It takes many nails to build a crib, but only one screw to fill it.


Tim said...

Gotta love 'em. I always liked these:

-Man standing on toilet is high on pot.

-Man who sit on tack get point!

I'm sure my brother has a million more...

addy said...

Ha! I'd seen a lot of these before but not all of them... I always liked the one that went "Virginity like bubble - one prick all gone."